Healthy Sexual Communication
Healthy sexual communication involves honesty, informed consent, risk reduction, mutual respect, feeling good about yourself, respecting boundaries, and much more!
Recipe for Healthy Sexual Communication
1. Learn what turns you on. Before you can communicate with a partner about what turns you on, you need to know what turns you on. Learning about anatomy and the particularly sensitive parts our genitals (Clitoris, Corona, Fremun) is just the first step. We all like different types of touches for sexual pleasure. Some people like stroking in different directions, and some people like lots of pressure or very little pressure. Masturbation can be a great way to help you understand what feels good to you.
2. Use clear language. Sex can mean a lot of different things to a lot of people. Sex can include: oral sex, manual sex, vaginal intercourse, anal sex, and mutual masturbation. Avoid vague language when chatting with a partner about the sexual activity you want. Before you go into the conversation, think about what you really want, what you are interested in, and what you absolutely do not want to do.
3. Be clear about consent. Many folks think that body language is easy to read, but we all express and understand each other differently. For example, giggling for some people might mean they are relaxed, and for other people giggling might mean they are nervous. This is why it’s important to use words with your partner about what kind of sexual activity you want. It’s also important to check in many times during sexual activity to make sure everyone still wants to continue.
4. Think about Safer Sex. Studies show that if you are worried about STI’s or an unintended pregnancy during sexual activity, the sexual activity won’t be pleasurable. Think about what precautions want to take for safer sex and what level of risk you’re willing to accept.